It happened again earlier this week.  Tuesday’s coaching call with a new, crying client was the tipping point for me.  I can recall at least a half-dozen people in as many months who’ve shared with me their significant life challenges in the areas of family, faith, finance, career and health.  Each shared with me how they had been inspired by, and had evoked the principles from the book and movie phenomenon The Secret, but had yet to make any progress towards their goals.  Let me share with you the secret about The Secret.  Are you ready? Here it is…

…there is no flipping secret!  I’ve read the book.  I’ve seen the movie.  And I’ve held my tongue for way too long about this.  For that, I am sorry.

The message of The Secret is absolutely useless, UNLESS you take action to make changes in your life.  Now I’m a big believer in the power of attitude and outlook.  In fact, in many of my talks, I share my belief that a positive attitude is vital to reaching success in any venture.  But a positive attitude, thinking good thoughts, and focusing on what you want is a waste of time if you’re not willing to take action and work hard (and smart) to get there.  This simple message has been lost on most followers of The Secret that I’ve met.

Please get this point: Action is Power! If I could miraculously download all the good and useful information on the internet directly into my brain, but not take action, all that information is just useless trivia.  Too many followers of The Secret are falling short of their dreams, and missing out on the personal reward that comes with old-fashioned hard work.  Believe it or not, there’s joy that comes with the blood, sweat and toil in relentlessly striving towards, and ultimately reaching your goal.

I fear that the message of The Secret only fuels the take-the-easy-way-out, it’s-not-my-fault, it’s-not-fair, woe-is-me, victim mentality that has permeated our culture.  Too many believe that if they simply wish for good things to happen to them, then it will be so.  Truthfully, it just ain’t so.

My new coaching client was lamenting that she hated her job, was frustrated she hadn’t made progress on the business plan she hoped would allow her to leave her job, and that she had lost most of her savings (that was meant for seed capital) in a poorly managed retirement account.  As I probed her on the steps she had taken in recent months to make changes in her situation, she broke down in tears.  She said she felt like her life was out of control, that she didn’t know what to do, but that she had reread The Secret, and had been watching the film every few days, visualizing opportunity and good things coming her way.  “WHAT!?  Are your FLIPPING kidding me?”  Well, that’s what I wanted to say to her, but instead we developed some action steps to get her off the dime so she could recognize some small victories by the end off the day, and make some significant progress this month.

In the book 9 Things You Simply Must Do, author Dr. Henry Cloud explores the mystery of why some people reach their goals and live fulfilled lives while others don’t.  The basis of Principle #5 is that we can achieve what we want by taking action and “acting like an ant.”  Many of us had ant farms when we were children.  By watching its activities we recognize that at first, very little seems to be happening.  Then we witness the ants starting to move the sand, one grain at a time.  Soon we begin to see tunnels form and sand hills on the surface.  Through one step at a time, one grain at a time, entire ant cities are built.  Successful people adopt and practice the “act like an ant” principle by taking one action step at a time.

We can all benefit from this analogy. Identify your goal, break it down into manageable tasks and complete at least one of those tasks every day.  Combine this action-oriented strategy with a positive attitude and you’ll be unstoppable.  That, my friend, is the real secret.

While the lone wolf spirit of independence drives some towards personal greatness, it rarely translates to great leadership in the real world.  Effective leaders are those who can build, develop and lead results-oriented teams.  Too often leaders falsely define a collection of ill-matched individuals as a “team,” and when dysfunction inevitably occurs, they find themselves struggling to identify ways that entice their people into enthusiastic, collaborative efforts.

The U.S. military has found ways to identify talents and traits among its elite warriors, where effective teamwork is the difference between success and failure, and life and death. In the Special Operations arena it is said, “Individuals play the game, but teams beat the odds.” A sense of mission, in concert with a blending of strengths, talents, and aptitudes creates some of the most highly effective teams found anywhere.  Entrepreneurs take courageous steps when starting and running businesses.  We have chosen to accept the responsibility and obligation to grow our businesses, while providing wealth-building opportunities for our families and associates.   With this comes the necessity to build highly effective teams.

To do this, begin by looking inward and recognizing that as leaders of our organizations we have the opportunity to create the culture and environment we long for.  There are few experiences more exhilarating or rewarding than being part of a high-performing team.  Conversely, few things are more stressful or frustrating than being part of a dysfunctional group of people pretending to be a team.  For several years after leaving active duty, I found myself longing for the camaraderie and kinship I found with my Special Forces teammates.  I soon realized when I started my company that I had the opportunity to recreate that feeling of reward and the desire to excel as a team, fueled by the knowledge that we belonged to something greater than ourselves.  Understanding the mission and objectives of the organization is of the utmost importance in achieving and maintaining this goal.

So, take action.  Clearly and concisely identify your organization’s vision, mission and values, and develop a ONE page strategic plan. We have found a powerful tool in developing these building blocks of success to be the book Prioritize! by Joe Calhoon.  It’s a reader-friendly, step-by-step guide to identifying and implementing strategies to improve your business.  When you finish the book you’ll have a One Page Strategic Plan that identifies your vision, mission, values, objectives, strategies, and priorities.

The best way to build a highly effective team is to ensure that the combined talents and inherent strengths of the team are those needed to accomplish the stated goals.  Now, Discover Your Strengths, by best selling authors Marcus Buckingham and Donald Clifton (Chair of the Gallup International Research and Education Center), and the companion website StrengthsFinder.com, are two key resources to help you identify the most prevalent human strengths of your team members.    The Gallup organization has studied human nature and behavior for more than 70 years and has conducted psychological profiles with more than two million people to help readers learn how to harness the power of these key themes.       The on-line StrengthsFinder survey identifies a team member’s top five unique talents and strengths, and the insight to manage them in others.

Every manager and supervisor in our organization has taken the survey, and we’ve plotted each member’s key themes on a grid to ensure we have the appropriate balance of natural visionaries, learners, arrangers, developers, etc. on each team.  When team members work within their natural strengths, and others doing the same surround them, magic happens.

The days of the lone wolf are over.  Great leadership includes effective team building, which yields unimaginable results and makes for great business.  Stand together and thrive, or stand alone and perish.

As I add more & more activities to my plate (more hotels, new business endeavors, writing, talks, coaching clients, etc.), I’ve been asked to share some simple tools I use to prioritize and stay connected with team members.  I’ll be sharing more of them in greater detail from time to time…and you can be sure we’ll have some great tools for you on the Tools For Success website when we launch in a few months (stay tuned).

The one thing that has worked for me over the years is my Daily To-Do sheets.  Although I love how technology has made most of what we do a lot easier, my old-fashioned, manual, paper Daily To-Do list is still my most effective (and beloved) tool–and I carry it virtually everywhere.  I love it because (like me) it’s simple, and it allows me to “download” my thoughts as quickly as they come to me so that I can keep my mind free of clutter.

I have one page for each day of the week, stapled together, with a section for each person who is a direct report, and then a couple areas for projects, phone calls, and miscellaneous.  Each line item has a small box where I can put initials of someone I am delegating to, or where I can rank projects based on priority.  I print these on colored paper so that it stands out on my desk, or in my briefcase.

What I really like about my To-Do sheets is what’s at the bottom of each page:  First, I have a daily reminder to “Avoid anything that I am not passionate about, or doesn’t use my strengths as: Strategic, Maximizer, Futuristic, Achiever, and Relator.” These strengths were identified through the book Now Discover Your Strengths. Second, it includes a few questions to ask team members as I meet with them (I don’t ask the questions every time, and I ask some team members more than others) to quickly get useful information and stay focused.  I don’t recall where I found these questions (sorry to whomever it is that developed them) but they have worked well for me:

1. What DECISIONS do you need from me?

2. What PROBLEMS are keeping you from your priorities?

3. What PLANS are you making (which we haven’t discussed)?

4. What PROGRESS have you made since we last spoke?

5. On a scale of 1 – 100, how are you PERSONALLY?  Why?

6. In what areas can I keep you and your family in my THOUGHTS and PRAY for you?

Without my To-Do list and calendar (I use Outlook and then print out a paper copy to keep with my To-Do list) I would be absolutely lost!  And I have lost it before…I’ve left it at hotels, restaurants, client offices, and even clothing stores in the past, and then paid FedEX to have it sent back to me.

I encourage you not to get seduced by the sexiest looking tool out there.  Instead, go for the tools that actually add efficiency and productivity to your life–whether it is electronic or manual.  I’ve left my paper Daily To-Do list in the past, but have always returned to her as my faithful friend.

If you’ve ever wondered why some organizations thrive, while others seem to shrivel up and die, you may want to look closely at their culture.  I was honored recently to have been asked by author Dianne Crampton to write the Foreward for her upcoming book, TIGERS Among Us, which stresses the importance of winning team cultures and why they thrive.  She shares with us stories from world-class organizations like Zappos.com, cut flower grower Dos Gringos, and advertising agency Tribe Inc., and offers tips, inventories and exercises throughout the book.

Here is part of my Foreward for the book:

“If your goal is to build a high functioning organization that redefines success for you and your team, you have the right book in your hands.  History is replete with stories, from boardrooms to battlefields, of smaller organization out-maneuvering and out-performing their larger, better-funded adversary.  How is this possible? The common denominator is found in the organization’s team culture and the unparalleled loyalty of its members.

When I met Dianne Crampton in Los Angeles last year, I was immediately intrigued as she shared with me the premise of this book.  I’d been blessed to serve on elite teams while in the military, and had significant…” (read the complete Foreward and first chapter of TIGERS Among Us by clicking here).

In preparation for the launch of this exciting book, Dianne has made available a couple of free gifts for us.  If you’d like a free white paper on How to Reduce Team Conflict, as well as a Team and Leadership Newsletter containing tips and strategies for building your team, please visit the TIGERS Among Us website.  By signing up, you’ll also receive updates on the upcoming book release.

Here’s to your success!